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(fwd) Re: I have had it!@%^&)(*&!!!!!!!!



>From psu.flame, and the about the only post of worth since last May.

Greg

-- forwarded message --
From: [email protected] (Brian Ward)
Newsgroups: psu.flame
Subject: Re: I  have had it!@%^&)(*&!!!!!!!!
Date: 17 Feb 1999 23:45:32 -0500
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
References: <[email protected]> <[email protected]> <[email protected]>

You can see here the Jen Star orbiting the forest moon of Flamedar. Although
the Jen Star's weapon systems are not yet operational, it does have a
powerful defense mechanism in form of a bandwidth shield.

[email protected] (Jennifer S. Mullen) writes:
|I doubt the geeks are annoyed.  They like to laugh at you - you're just
|*so* easy.

A small rebel team will land on the moon and attempt to destroy the
bandwidth generator. This will be possible because the Jenpire has not
considered the possibility of a small attack force not made of up geeks.

|Yes, folks, it's true:  you're only worth the dollar amount on your
|paycheck.

Once the shield is down, the Rebel fleet will create a diversion by
hiring business school dropouts to flirt.

|I dial up using MS software from home.

The rebel attack force will then install the new "tricky" version of
Internet Exploder to fully enable ActiveX.

|My access rates are fine.

While the Jen Star is confused by the sudden change in average velocity
achieved by using a trick known as "showing the same image over and over
again," the rebel force will find the FAT and scribble on it,

|Sure there are times when I can't connect, but they are few and far between
|and chances are I can do whatever I need to do later.

causing intermittant failure,

|It's called a sense of perspective.

and lead the Jen Star to consider reinstalling the operating system,

|If you're having such a tough time, then try another ISP.

as well as a move to another sector.

|Please leave your personal life out of this.

After a few minutes of this, the Jen Star will seem have an awful lot of
trouble with its lifestyle lately.

|I don't know whether I'm an insider or an outsider here,

And wonder if it just isn't, like, part of some whole huge other world.

|I'll give you a hint: BorkBot.

Such as one inhabited wholly by Swedish chefs.

|Well, at least you wouldn't be taking it here.

But decide that such a thing couldn't be portable.

|s/piss off/amuse

Finally, the Jen Star will explode into a million substitutions, with the
only substantial remainder being a signature with a lot of stars and pipes.

|Jennifer S. Mullen          | "Nothing happens in contradiction to nature,
|[email protected]          | just in contradiction to what we know of it"
|http://cac.psu.edu/~jsm158/ |   -Dana Scully, "The X-Files"
|**Support responsible herptoculture: http://www.nraac.org ** OBSSE**

-- end forwarded message --
-- 
Gregory S. Sutter                  Failing sardine factory cans employees!
mailto:[email protected]
http://www.pobox.com/~gsutter/
PGP DSS public key 0x40AE3052
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