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mph-humor Digest V97 #15




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mph-humor Digest				Volume 97 : Issue 15

Today's Topics:
	 Get your facts first...
	 Re: Apple Steal From Bill Gates!!!
	 MS optimizations
	 Re: Orbital Gates
	 Re: MS adopts UNIX
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Get you facts first...
...and then you may distort them as you please.

Specifically, release the wrong facts loudly, then quietly go back and
correct them later and hope nobody will notice...


In article <[email protected]>
[email protected] (Arun Gupta) writes:

> For the last seven quarters [ 2Q 95 to 4Q 96] the SPA 
> [Software Publisher's Association ] has been
> reporting year-to-year declines in the Macintosh software sales,
> and yet, the size of the Macintosh software market keeps increasing!
> This tradition of misreporting continues in its latest release.
> 
> One year ago, in <http://www.spa.org/research/tables/press95.htm>,
> SPA reported that 1995 Macintosh software sales were $1054.7 million,
> down 13.9% from 1994.
> 
> This year, [a day or two ago], in material that can be found at
> <http://www.spa.org/research/releases/1996na.htm> and
> <http://www.spa.org/research/releases/96na.htm>,
> SPA reports that 1996 Macintosh software sales were $1170.8 million,
> down 23% from 1995.
> 
> How did $1054.7 million in 1995 to $1170.8 million in 1996 
> constitute a drop ?
> 
> Well, SPA revised its 1995 figures : it now says Macintosh software
> sales in 1995 were $1520.8 million !



--
Eric Bennett ( [email protected] ; http://www.pobox.com/~ericb )

Sixty-seven percent of the doctors surveyed preferred X to Y.  (Jones
couldn't be persauded.)
-John Allen Paulos
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In article <[email protected]>
"Aristophanes" <[email protected]> writes:

> >  Get a life outside your limited universe the Mac dictates to you.  Master
> > Bill will lead your copycat company (MAC) into the 21st century and show
> > the dummies who follow that they are not such big idiots!!!  Lose that
> > old, tired, slow, useless, and stolen code laden Apple and get a real
> > computer!!!  A 200 mhz WINDOWS MACHINE close to a Cray)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> True quote from Bill Gates when Windows was launched:
> 
> "Mac on PC! Mac on PC!" he shouted and jumped up on a table.



--
Eric Bennett ( [email protected] ; http://www.pobox.com/~ericb )

Sixty-seven percent of the doctors surveyed preferred X to Y.  (Jones
couldn't be persauded.)
-John Allen Paulos
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In article <[email protected]>
[email protected] (Philth) writes:

> Check out PC Magazine April issue. They pit SGI, PPro, Mac, and
> a few others
> 
> 1) Compaq Pro Workstation (Dual PP200Mhz - 128MB Ram.) - $10,200 Street
> 2) DayStar Genesis MP 800+ (4 PowerPC 604e 200Mhz - 128MB Ram) - $11,500 
> Street.
> 3) SGI O2 (MIPS R5000SC 180Mhz - 192MB Ram) - $11,500 Street

[snip]

>------------------
>MicroSoft Word  (Well, Cant blame them for optimising it under their own OS)

[snip]

> Spell Check
> 1> 4 seconds
> 2> 59 seconds
> 3> 2minutes17seconds

A dual PPro is 30 times faster than an SGI O2 when running
Microsoftware.  Lovely.



--
Eric Bennett ( [email protected] ; http://www.pobox.com/~ericb )

Sixty-seven percent of the doctors surveyed preferred X to Y.  (Jones
couldn't be persauded.)
-John Allen Paulos
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In article <[email protected]>
[email protected] (Brian "Beej" Hall) writes:

> In article <[email protected]>,
> Insectus Pentius <[email protected]> wrote:
> >Could you imagine this error message during the Cold War?
> 
> This is so unrealistic that I feel compelled as a strong
> detractor^H^H^H^H^H^H^Hsupporter of Microsoft to offer a correction:
> 
> >Fatal Error Reading NORAD: Abort, Retry, Launch? l
> >Formatting Earth.....
> 
> Should read:
> 
> Fatal Error Reading NORAD: Abort, Retry, Launch? a
> Fatal Error Reading NORAD: Abort, Retry, Launch? a
> Fatal Error Reading NORAD: Abort, Retry, Launch? a
> Fatal Error Reading NORAD: Abort, Retry, Launch? a
> Fatal Error Reading NORAD: Abort, Retry, Launch? a
> Fatal Error Reading NORAD: Abort, Retry, Launch? r
> Fatal Error Reading NORAD: Abort, Retry, Launch? a
> Fatal Error Reading NORAD: Abort, Retry, Launch? r
> Fatal Error Reading NORAD: Abort, Retry, Launch? l
> Formatting Earth....



--
Eric Bennett ( [email protected] ; http://www.pobox.com/~ericb )

Sixty-seven percent of the doctors surveyed preferred X to Y.  (Jones
couldn't be persauded.)
-John Allen Paulos
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In article <[email protected]>
[email protected] (Wayne Hyde) writes:

> On 4 Apr 1997 05:19:37 GMT, Jonathan A. Maxwell
> <[email protected]> wrote:
> 
> >In comp.os.ms-windows.nt.advocacy unique cat <[email protected]> wrote:
> >] Here's an interesting item.
> >]
> >] [...] the story of a new deal between MS and Hewlett Packard in
> >] which, basically, microsoft is going to port most of HPUX (HP's
> >] UNIX) into windows to get Win NT to scale better.
> >]
> >] Maybe the merger of HPUX and Windows NT will be called Win UX?
> >] Naaaaah!!
> 
> >No, they'll call it MSUX.
> 
> Argh.  Why HPUX?   Grrrr... Hewlett Packard should have been named
> Packard Hewlett so HPUX would be called PHUX.  Ok, so HP/UX isn't my
> favorite when compared to SunOS or even AIX.  :)
> 
> --
> Wayne Hyde                  | 	             System Administrator
> [email protected]        |  Delete 'SPAM' from my address before replying.
> http://coop.wec.ufl.edu/wjh |         I speak for me, not my employers



--
Eric Bennett ( [email protected] ; http://www.pobox.com/~ericb )

Sixty-seven percent of the doctors surveyed preferred X to Y.  (Jones
couldn't be persauded.)
-John Allen Paulos
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